That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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