If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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