She is in my trunk
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
