I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
