There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
