I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
So. Much. Porn.
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