Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
