He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
