there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Randomize
