$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
