Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
