Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
