Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
