Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
ugly people sure do ruin things
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Randomize
