Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
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