Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
