lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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