Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Randomize
