Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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