i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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