You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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