counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
