Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
