I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Randomize
