I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
