love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
