I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
