"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
