Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
