Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
