I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Just pee around me
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
