I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
