She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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