u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
