whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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