I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Randomize
