remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
