Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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