One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
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