I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
