He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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