why do cheetos always look like penises
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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