I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Randomize
