It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
My feet surprised me
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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