They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Randomize
