So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
