shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
