Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Can vaginas get frostbite?
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
