you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
you inspire me to be a worse person
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
where are my eyebrows?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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