i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
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